By ROSLI MANSOR AHMAD RAZALI
“If I have dementia, please remember that I am still the person you know and love.”
This poignant plea, shared in conjunction with Alzheimer’s Awareness Month last June, serves as a sobering reminder of the reality faced by dementia patients, individuals who are not just forgetful, but who also need compassion, respect and dignity throughout the remainder of their lives.
In a heartfelt message that recently went viral on social media, dementia patients urged families and friends to understand that their world may no longer be the same.
Among their simple requests is for loved ones to always introduce themselves upon entering the room and to avoid asking, “Do you know who I am?”, which only adds to their anxiety.
More moving still, they wish to be accepted as they are, even if at times they still believe their spouse is alive, want to return to their parents’ home, or become confused about what is past and present.
“If I have dementia, please don’t argue with me about what’s true for you versus what’s true for me. Let me be happy in my reality,” read one of the many touching appeals.
Not to be treated like children
Dementia patients also do not want to be treated like children. They want to be spoken to as adults and encouraged to continue enjoying the activities they love, whether it is reading, exercising, or meeting friends.
If they can no longer handle cutlery, families are advised to switch to finger foods, allowing them to continue attempting to feed themselves.
They also hope not to be excluded from family gatherings or separated from the music that has long been part of their lives.
Above all, they long for their hands to be held, to be listened to when anxious, and not to be talked about as though they are invisible.
Don’t shoulder the guilt; seek help
Families are also reminded not to feel guilty if they cannot care for a dementia patient around the clock. Instead, they are encouraged to seek assistance or find a suitable care facility, and to visit as often as possible.
“If I am staying in a dementia care centre, please visit me frequently. If I seem restless, take the time to understand what might be troubling me,” the message continued.
Alzheimer’s Awareness Month, observed last June, aimed to increase public understanding of this disease that not only robs memory but also deeply affects a patient’s emotions and sense of self-worth.
As a tribute to those still fighting or who have already succumbed to dementia or Alzheimer’s, the public is urged to be more empathetic, patient and loving, so these individuals can continue to feel valued — even as their world grows ever more uncertain.
